For the First Time...

I feel quite productive. I lengthened two pairs of pants and fixed an unraveled hem on one of my skirts today. On top of that, I wrapped a bunch of Christmas presents and just started the wash. (Shit, that doesn't sound like much in retrospect.) This break I am taking advantage of all the time I've got, rather than pretending that it's going to be as long as it feels, because school breaks always fly by.

I work the next couple of days, so I have had to pen things in my planner to ensure stuff gets done before Matt and I's real vacation to San Diego on the 26th. I say "real" because despite not flying (as we'd hoped we would), we will be staying at a nice hotel in the middle of the city (rather than his grandparents'; they moved to a nursing home a few months ago), and we planned for this 5-6-day vacation to be, well... a vacation. All our previous visits to San Diego have been so short we'd barely spend more than one full day there, and we were in Santee (a suburb of SD) most of the time. I think most of those "vacations" were spent driving than actually vacationing. Despite expecting to visit Seattle/Vancouver, I'll take whatever I can get.

On my agenda this upcoming break is to search for and complete internship applications, finish my study abroad application, sell some clothes on eBay, and download lots of music.

What I hope to continue doing is not spend money on outside food if I am by myself. This has helped my finances considerably, considering how much I dropped last week on presents.

Wishing everyone a safe and happy Christmas. Hope you have a good new year, too!

A Few Things

Firstly, I realized today (bit late) that I must be an economics major because I detest inefficiency. I hope I hate it enough that I will work to combat it as a working professional. Mainly, I realized this today because I had bought nearly a dozen rolls of assorted ribbons for my cousin's upcoming wedding (this Labor Day weekend, in fact), fully aware that most of them would be brought back to the store for a refund. In my mind, buying more than was needed would save multiple trips to the store to buy additional things to compare and contrast. Why not just buy everything we may potentially need/like for the wedding and bring all the unused supplies back after it's all over?

Without asking my permission, and without any of the receipts which I had so methodically saved, she decided to return all of them to the store, only to receive in-store credit. But of course in-store credit didn't bother her in the least, because "you can always use the in-store credit when you shop at Walmart" and "it was on the way [to wherever she was going, presumably]." This is annoying because my original plans were disrupted, not by any uncontrollable circumstance, but simply because my mother didn't have the sense to consult me first (not to mention that I don't want goddamn in-store credit). Communication, people.

Secondly, it only hit me the evolutionary significance of eyelashes since I began using contact lenses again. It is such a pain in the ass to nudge those things onto your eyes. Removing them, however, is not nearly as much of a hassle but is still not enjoyable. I've worked with the contact lenses a few times already and am still not getting the hang out it.

Finally, it just feels a lot better to give than to receive. I think most people acknowledge this and do mean it, but rarely actually feel fully satisfied and fulfilled from doing it. Maybe I say this because truly giving is something I don't do too often, and usually the greatest satisfaction comes from giving to the people that mean the most. There is underlying reciprocity in all of this, of course. This point is probably getting a bit cliche.

Another Fall

I just finished my first week of junior year, and I am already extremely pleased. I am taking the following classes:

Sports Economics
Intermediate Macroeconomics
Intro to Written Chinese
Math for Economics

My favorite class so far is Chinese; this particular course is designed for people who speak Chinese but don't have substantial reading or writing skills, i.e., people who have lived in a Chinese-speaking environment for an "extended period of time." So the class is writing and reading intensive. I was shocked (though I really shouldn't have been surprised) that the whites outnumbered the Asians 9 to 1. They probably outnumbered us even more than that, considering there are ~28 in the class and I counted about 4 Asians, including myself. (But my math skills are abhorrent, so don't quote me on that.) The majority of the whites are male also, presumably return Mormon missionaries from Chinese-speaking countries (mostly Taiwan, probably). I have to admit I was slightly saddened that there were so few Asians in the class. I guess I had imagined this would be the class where I would have the highest probability of befriending new people.

But I am no longer bothered by that considering all the people I have spoken to so far have been non-Asian (non-Asian because I haven't only spoken to whites, who are the majority ethnic group in Utah).

This fall is going to be different, for reasons more certain than others. For one, I don't have access to my friends at the push of a button anymore. Ivy has gone to Ghana, Sophia to Hong Kong, and Helen is heading to Prague soon (if she hasn't left already). I haven't seen Jihye since I transferred from NYU, because she has been on a leave of absence in her home country Korea since last spring. She is officially studying abroad in Korea this fall with special permission from NYU. (NYU doesn't have a study abroad site in Korea, so Jihye had submit a petition, and it was obviously successful.) Secondly, I embrace my current situation a lot more than I did before, though I can't say that I am 100% recovered. My outlook is more optimistic, and though I have not given up my dream of returning to New York, I understand that the remainder of my undergraduate career doesn't have to be miserable, and that I can keep my dreams and be satisfied with my current life. In other words, I can have my cake and eat it, too.

Swearing is like organized/established religion. I'll have to abstain from it until I've judged my kids are mature enough to have a say in the matter, i.e., whether they get to swear (although you never know who will expose it to your kids first). The difference between swearing and religion is that I won't be explaining swear words to my kids before they're "of age", whereas I would be more than happy to indulge their religious interests as best I can. Lord knows I'm not the most well-versed in religious studies, but I would be more than happy to brush up for the sake of appeasing my kids' intellectual appetite.

I began reading a novel entitled Loving Frank a few days ago, albeit I was slightly hesitant to begin reading it. I had been under the impression that it was a memoir written by Frank Lloyd Wright's wife/partner about their relationship, but when I finally picked up the book from the public library, realized that it is actually a work of fiction with historical bits weaved into the narrative. What the book really is about is Lloyd Wright's love affair (while married) with Mamah Cheney (also married). My hesitance drew not from the subject of cheating, but from the fact that this was a novel, and not a memoir, as I had mistakenly assumed.

Nonetheless, I began reading the book, and found myself slightly uncomfortable whilst reading the "cheating" bits. I'm less than 100 pages in and already the author has divulged much of the affair's details and encounters. They're not graphic by any means but evoke a bit of guilt in the reader. I suppose one can only assume this demonstrates literary skill on the writer's part, right?

Anyway, at this point I am not terribly interested in the subject matter and all that, but it is an easy read and not unenjoyable by any means, so I intend to finish it (hopefully before Matt returns from Maryland).

What inspires me to write is seeing how interesting and insightful other people's blogs are. I always hope to accomplish an entry worthy of reading but always feel I fall short somewhere in terms of substance or style. Nevertheless, I chug on and hope that maybe somewhere within my blog there will be something worth reading.


It is basically the eve of my junior year in college, and I am now an economics (BA) major. I will begin a Mandarin language course designed for native speakers, and which concentrates on reading and writing, this fall, in addition to my other economics requirements. I think this Chinese course will be the deciding factor into whether I will declare a second major in Chinese. I figured I may as well take the plunge, since taking this "native" class places me at an advantage in that I become exempt from the beginner Mandarin courses. What's more, the rest of the major requirements consist of electives such as literature, Chinese culture, and other non-language CHIN electives that are taught in English. So why not major in Chinese?

Post-Holidays Post

I reserve the same sentiment at this time of year that I've held for the past few years: a slight feeling of dreariness. It is always a drag after Christmas and New Year's, and I find myself not wanting to let go of the previous year. Maybe that's a good thing; maybe it signals nostalgia. 

Pre-Christmas and post-finals was an especially awesome time. I did probably 80% of the Christmas shopping for my household this year, and thoroughly enjoyed it. The wrapping was also fun. I ended 2008 celebrating Matthew and I's one-year dating anniversary. I know how cheesy it sounds, but I wasn't about to pass up my boyfriend's own initiative to arrange something special. Since his parents would be out of town he was staying at his parents' house to watch his younger brother. I joined him on the 31st (the anniversary) for quiet time involving a home-cooked dinner, pizza, and two Jack Nicholson movies: Something's Gotta Give and As Good As It Gets. I don't think we could have celebrated the occasion better; I had also caught a cold of sorts in the days prior so I appreciated the low-keyness. Something's Gotta Give is one of my favorite movies. I could watch it over and over again. In the middle of the night at some point, Matthew gave me a very small gold chain! Stunning. It is only one-half of the gift, though. The online store fucked up and have yet to deliver the koala bear pendant that he bought separately. But I don't mind, as he's been refunded the fee he paid for expedited shipping.

I have also finalized my class schedule for my second semester at the U of Utah. It's gone through two or three rounds of adjustments since my starting registration date in November. My last schedule arrangement included a half accounting/business focus and half history focus, as preparation for a tentative move toward a professorship in history or something similar. Since then, however, I got a B in my Victorian Britain history class and have become rather disillusioned at the prospect of a professorship. I don't think it was the lower-than-expected grade that made me doubt my abilities as much as that it simply got me thinking, as little things tend to do with me. It got me to thinking about the potential finance route I had always imagined myself pursuing as a youngster. I realized that I have always been more comfortable in a static environment--not that I wouldn't like business trips or hustle and bustle in my work place. But I guess I have always seen myself as a business suit wearing professional working on Wall Street. So now I've got half of my schedule devoted to accounting, and the other to economics. 

I just hope my classes end up being a good fit for me, and that Matthew and I will study well together. Crazy as it sounds, it really was great to study with people in Bobst even if I didn't always get much done. It was great even studying there alone but surrounded by strangers, to be engulfed in a place where everyone was working toward one thing. I have always been pretty comfortable in a classroom type of environment when I have been left to my own devices, i.e., not picked on by the teacher to say something insightful.

I hope everybody had a nice holiday. I don't have a new year's resolution because I don't believe in new year's resolutions. I just have resolutions. I guess I'll end this post with a list:

1) Devote myself to once-daily bikram yoga when schedule permits (to begin once I get my car back from the shop in 10 days or so... )

2) Read more

3) Sell my latin dance shoes

4) Be more extroverted

5) Cook more, eat out less